Weights and measures

Avoirdupois is stupid. Avoirdupois is the archaic English system of weights (16 drams to the ounce; 16 ounces to the pound, etc.) that had been abandoned by every civilized nation on earth except the United States. If you fear conversion, you should not. You already drink water from half liter bottles, and I bet you don’t even worry about how many ounces that is. As a scientist, I went metric years ago. I am more likely to estimate length in cm than inches. Once you get a feel for how big each unit is, you just live in that world. The only difficulty I can see is in converting recipes, but that will only have to be done once and only when avoirdupois cups and measuring spoons are no long available.

Those of you who saw me in person last week know that I am riddled with disease and pestilence. When I gave the first exam Tuesday, all I heard from the students were sniffles and coughs. I didn’t stand a chance. Thus, I was in the market for some cough syrup, having finished what was left in the medicine cabinet from my last cold. Long ago when I was a respiratory therapist, I learned that cough suppressants and expectorants should not be taken together as they work at cross purposes. The function of a cough suppressant is obvious. An expectorant is designed to make you expectorate, that is cough up the crap that is in your lungs. Taking both together, the reasoning went, loosens the crap in your lungs and lets it sit there.

Over the years, however, it has gotten increasingly difficult to find cough syrup that does not have both (in addition to various combinations of pain reliever, decongestants, and antihistamines). In fact, I could find only one pure cough suppressant, a 12-hour formulation that seemed like a good idea. I hoped to make it through the day Thursday without having an embarrassing fit of hacking in front of the students. The dose was 10 ml, easily understood to all and sundry as “fill to the line on the cup in the box.” No ounce-to-ml conversion needed. The size of the bottle? 89 ml (3 fl oz). They can’t put in one more ml and sell it as a full 9 doses? Stupid.

Cough syrup sold in bottles of 8.9 doses

The cough suppressant without expectorant wasn’t so good either. After the first night on the new medicine, I had some serious chest congestion that wouldn’t budge. So I went to the store for some expectorant tablets.

My plan was to rest and drink lots of fluids Friday afternoon and Saturday. Then I was going to wake up well this morning. My plan did not work out. I am distinctly not all better. I still have coughing spells right down to my socks and need to keep up a steady diet of cold medications. I have not one shred of ambition. So tired of coughing. So tired, period. I feel that I will never have any energy again. I am, in fact, having a good old wallow today. Poor me. Maybe I’ll have a little nap.